50 shades of Grey: How to remove this Awfulness from my mind

My review: 50 shades of grey I feel compelled to write this review to warn you about this book. If you are feeling particularly horny and need an erotic novel standby then yeah I would suggest this, but if you're looking for something that attempts to investigate the labyrinth of human sexuality then this is definitely not it! I bought this book because I expected intelligent characters that touches on a bit more maybe a sneak into the of human personality that drives us to explore the shades of grey that encompass playing with both the dark and erotic, looking for something that begins to touch on the actual feral nature of sexuality and our struggle to contain or tame it , trying to understand these shades of grey. However you are left with a strong desire to bind and gag yourself and beat yourself senseless for even bothering to read this book and the fuckedupness of the 50 shades of Mr. (Rapist) Grey. The name is deceiving, I expected something delicious, nice snippets into the darkness and of human sexuality. Instead I found a poorly written novel by some woman probably expressing her deepest unfulfilled bizarre sexual desires. By the tone of this book, I would've assumed that the author is either (a). A virgin or (b). A bisexual male. The reasons for this is because of her lack of any reasonable knowledge of female sexuality. In the book we find out that Ms. Anastasia is indeed a virgin, her wantonness and insatiable sexual need for Mr. Grey (50 shades) may simply be explained by her lack of sexual knowledge of any kind. Her character is described as being intelligent but in reality she seems nothing more than an insatiable little sex addict who experiences her first Fuck and simply wants more! Furthermore the extremely gorgeous Mr. Grey obviously has rapist tendencies ( the description of him is suitable for the AXE commercials where women are obviously drawn to cannot get enough of males who wear axe) Seriously it is as ridiculous as that. Even within the depth and darkness of bondage and domination at least there should be some reality. These characters are completely UN-realistic , worse than B-grade porn. I really would like a refund. I admit I read it until the end searching and hoping for a bit of something tangible, intellectually stimulating, even a small taste but Ms. E.L. James continues to disappoint and dish out a wildly boring but eloquently written series of repetitive cliched pornographic scenes. I Wikipedia it to find out the ending. My inner goddess and my conscience both threw up and decided to bitch slap me into next year for wasting my time with this novel. Gosh I need to go back to my love and cholera or at least wander back into the world of the real Tess...

A plea for Human Rights

This is graphic and difficult to watch, but it is a wake up call to the West. It is time that we stopped hiding form the issues that we cannot face and finally do something about it. As we go on with our everyday life it is nearly impossible to fathom the fear, horror and torment that the Congolese people live with. Please watch the video and try to get involved, I am sure that the call for human rights from many voices would be a formidable weapon to end the conflict in the Congo. Life is precious, it is our duty to fight for it and to preserve it and to ensure that others at least get to experience it.
Take a minute to sign the petition here and write to your Representative to ensure that PL 109-456 fully implemented.
No man is an island, the pain in the Congo will affect us all, we are all connected through love, life and humanity.
Please at least sign the petition:
http://www.change.org/petitions/fully-implement-public-law-109-456

Letting go to hold on

Nothing happens without cosmic guidance,

The wise say that patience will uncloak purpose

The intelligent claim that purpose is what you make it

In the heart of a child, purpose is driven by curiosity

by love, by fear, by listening to our heart

The mistake is to think that we can control the outcome,

another mistake lies in not trying,

the dilemma of the soul...

Enjoy and learn from what is there in front of you

Sometimes it makes sense to swim

with the current and wait,

Sometimes it makes sense to swim against

the current if land is within sight.

Time is space, space is time,

every moment, everyone, everything,

its purpose

and meaning is dependent on the exact

timing and placement in this continuum.



Depending on timing , purpose and space

what was forbidden now

evolves to become mundane

what was accepted is now forbidden

and becomes enshrouded in mystery.

Art in time

degrades unless appreciated

and the ordinary becomes a gem...

Just being Silly

Started doodling, want to try comics, here's my first attempt!

Should one change?

Sometimes, maybe if the entire world tells you that you're crazy, the mind begins to weaken a little bit and starts to believe them, and then again therein lies the strength to be firm and realize but wait a minute I am content, and given the conditioning that has brought me here, you realize the need for the walls, introversion, unexpected extroversion and then the ultimate point in that I am simply human, and not beyond the external conditioning, but in reality who cares.? It is this conditioning process , life which we experience, five senses like antennas feeling all carrying signals back to the brain and then further beyond straight to the core, which processes and then more importantly directs its role in shaping and molding personality. What is the point in living if one had the firmness but brittleness of iron, then where is the flexibility for compassion, understanding, curiosity, but who am I to say then if one finds their niche in inflexibility? No two beings are the same...

In re-reading it seems that I just penned a series of ultimate paradoxes all incoherent which eventually instead of converging to a point, chooses to erupt and scatter giving a rather vivid picture of the chaos and extreme brutality of thought that can torment, clam, rage and sustain the mind.

I wrote this three years ago, surprisingly I find myself back at this point, no matter how the world,circumstance and society will bend and flex the personality, part of it remains the same, untouched, stubborn and deliberate.
I am who I am :)

Relationships : the very nature of water...

Was discussing with a friend, human nature and how strong relationships are and how we're related to water;
In that with human relationships we should feel attraction like hydrogen bonds because of the dipole and water's/human's polar nature :)
To feel attraction and then to feel repulsion, it is what defines humans, society and the very structure of water.
but like how water forms hydrogen bonds so too that should be our ability to form relationships, while hydrogen bonds are strong, when they break it will not destroy us as much as if our relationships were covalent, it is then that we destroy our own very nature when a loved one leaves us or dies.
but even so to think about the very nature of water, the cohesive properties of molecules to one another and then to realize that it has such a high specific heat, so much energy is needed to change state,to become volatile, but with impurities this can be lowered. In relating to human bonds how impurities in friendships like doubt, avarice, pettiness will lower the strength and destroy what is there.
So in a way to be attached, know the possibility of a bond breaking but also too look forward to new bonds forming, just like water, after all we're about 70% water anyway :)

A delicate balance between Conformity and Dissolution.

They say,the early bird will catch the worm ,however it is the second mouse
that gets the cheese.
What about the worm? Do we need to be late or early if we are the worm?
It is funny how we create and dictate standards, but the earth
rotates, its always night whenever it is day.

Thinking about the story I heard when I was little about how a foolish
boy dropped a shilling in the night and lit a twenty dollar bill to
find it.
But what if that shilling was a collectors piece, what if it was worth
nothing but to the boy it was given as a present from his late
grandfather?

Things should only have value for us based on our intrinsic relationship and
attachment with it, and not be dependent on whether or not everyone around us loves it.

What we love should be just that, what we love, and not because
everyone else loves it or thinks that we should...

Society the big churning and spinning wheel that crushes our minds and
instincts, makes it to a paste and then cannibalistic-ally feeds it
back to us so that we can all suffer form the degenerative brain
disease that forces our thinking, our deep feelings to adhere and
conform to popular thought.

When do we lose sight?
Adhering and conforming to beliefs to be the best of what? The best of
what everyone else says we should be?

We're all made up of cells working together, that antagonize one
system and then provide synergistic input to another.
Individual existence is a myth, the untainted or unaltered mind is also a myth.
Free will? or the inability to conform being born out of an intrinsic
soul purpose or programming from birth for another role?

Happy New Year!

For the oddest reasons, I kept the walls up, secluded in seclusion, it was so dark, I never even realized that light was missing!

Denying myself a passion that sustains me.


Hello Bloggers, Happy New year!

String Theory

From my grafitti :P

Divorced

In a murky dark place for the past year,
Awakened and set free.
Bound by my own mind, tormented by my own heart,seeking love from one living with too many of his own demons.

The unfulfilled heart, the saddened and unforgiving soul, can never love another, until he can love himself.

What is a man, if he can live without love...


Finally to awake fully from a nightmare and with clarity look back on the child that was married, then left alone by a man who was nothing more than a boy.

Divorced, but free. I'd rather live without the thorn, there are many other different kinds of flowers, many without thorns.

A year of questions, a year of blame, a year of pain, the only way to escape the darkness is to find the courage to walk through it, the reality to open my eyes and to stop making excuses for him.
To walk through the darkness, and overcome the fear.